I was going to do a fancy new profile page, but I'm not that creative. That's obvious by the fact that everything you see here on The Crack is the creation of Stacy, the only person I talk to somewhat regularly that I don't work with. I came up with most of the content and she created all the pages contained within the boundaries of this super fantastic webpage. I've created a few kagillion webpages and SLC is the only one to stay online for more than a year mostly because Mayonessa.com hosts it and she decided to keep it for posterity reasons. As you can tell from Plagerism is Fun! updates have been few and far between so it's not like this is a hip happening place to be. That being said, let's get the show on the road. Here's some useless crap you don't really need to know and will probably forget in five minutes if anyone is actually looking at this page. And become I'm too dumb and uncreative I'm going to steal the list format thing that Stacy used on her webpage.
Name : I've had a few hundred nicknames while on the net and I don't really have one now. All you need to know is that I am here and see all. Now if you insist on having a name call me Jose.
D.O.B. : 09/11/79 - Yes I was born on the same day as the Twin Towers in NY had planes flown into them. Don't ask me how weird it is or if it sucks. If I wasn't such an uncaring and hateful bastard sometimes then I might have an opinion. As it is it's just someting I've accepted and decided to blame on my generally shitty luck in life.
D.O.D. : Who cares? We've all got to die sometime. I just don't want Oprah or Dr. Phil to still have tv shows when I'm gone.
Height : 5'5" to 6'6"
Lardness : Big enough to make Stacy look like Kate Moss.
Follicles : I've got a white guy fro right now.
My Happy Home : I was born in Houston (recently chosen as the most unhealthy city in the country by someone) and I currently reside in St. Louis. I'm really miserable here and hate this place, but I prolly won't move out because I hate moving almost as much as this city.
Edumication : I did indeed graduate highschool. My first two years were in Texas my last two were in Misery. There you had to put forth some effort here I slept mostly.
I did graduate with an Associates degree from ITT Technical Institute, a school you really had to try to fail at, at least the one I went to. I don't really used the degree except for decoration seeing as I basically clean phones and unscrew circuit boards from one and put them in another.
Family : Yes I have one. I get along pretty good with most of them. Here's what they look like if you want to know. I'm the one taking the picture.
Money Pits : A retarded dog named Wallee, but only really responds to being called Carl.
Actually the heading is a bit misleading. I don't like too many people, but the one person who's been around even if we don't talk for periods of time is Stacy. I've got her webpage linked at the top of this one. Anyways she's always been good to me and seen some good in me that she insists exists. Who knows? I'll take her word for it.
Let me say right off the bat that I hate tv. Most of it sucks and is complete crap, and I especially hate fucking "reality" tv. I watched the first episode of the first Survivor and that was it. God awful shit.
That being said let's talk a bit about cartoons. Most today suck because they're aimed at five year olds and made to look like anime with bulbous heads and football sized tears. But then again animation is for kids right? Anyways, some toons that are worthwhile are ThunderCats,Scooby-Do,He-Man,Voltron,Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, and SpongeBob Squarepants. There are quite a few other cartoons that are good that right now I'm just too lazy to list. 80's Cartoon Central has index a good majority of the cartoons from the 80's.
Like cartoons most of what's coming out today sucks. I can't stand radio anymore because I don't fucking want to hear the same ten songs during the day even if one of them is Nelly rapping about shoes. But I digress I'm not a thirteen-year-old girl so nobody cares what I think. Mostly because I'm talking to myself through this webpage I'm only going to list a few bands I like. They include Alanis Morissette,Garbage,Audioslave,Foo Fighters,The Offspring, The Donnas, and to end it on a high note I also currently listen to Avril Lavigne. Every once in awhile I get a hankering for some good old fashioned pop music and this time it's her. There are just too many bands to list and like I said earlier I'm just lazy and talking to myself through this page so it's not going to really matter.
As I look back over this page now I realize that it might seem to the untrained eye that I'm hateful, lazy, stupid, or one of a million other things, but I just want to get one thing straight. The one reason I leave the house is cuz I love off-roading. Here is a picture of my truck and a picture of me jumping some tree logs.
One more thing before I shut down this mess of a page. I just wanted to send my deepfelt sympathies to Stacy for working on my crap ass site and for me stealing her page so I could use the format here. You are indeed a true life something or another. Now it's over. Click below or on your back button.
